A Vision for LGBTQ+ Affirming Catholicism
“How does one get across the fact that the best way to find out how people feel about their gender or their sexuality––or anything else, really––is to listen to what they tell you, and to try to treat them accordingly, without shellacking over their version of reality with yours?” Harry Dodge, in The Argonauts
One of my biggest challenges as someone who self-describes as transgender and Catholic is the lack of education around LGBTQ+ issues within the Catholic church. I know that LGBTQ+ is a lot of letters, but there are a lot of people on this planet (over 7.5 billion) all of whom have unrepeatable human dignity, and I think it’s worth the time invested to listen and learn when people want to tell you who they are.
When it comes to church teaching, gay catholics are told they must use certain terms (same-sex attracted--which has its own acronym, SSA), and that their sexual and romantic desires are disordered and wrong. Transgender catholics are given the message that to transition is deeply abhorrent to God. There are only a small handful of actual Catholic teachings directly addressing LGBTQ+ issues, but catholic communities take those teachings and run with them in ways that are often extremely harmful.
Priests in particular do harm through confessions wherein they do not understand what it means to have a queer identity… or they simply describe the person who has come to them as having wounds that God may never heal in this life. Other catholic leaders in the community either preach openly against queer identities or counsel individuals on how to assimilate to try to act and live in a “normal” way. Catholic high schools fire gay teachers. Catholic hospitals refuse care to transgender patients. And so on.
The broader catholic community does not present itself as a non-judgemental, safe place for people to worship God--in fact it seems more like a lion’s den, prowling with those who wish to paint queer people as the worst kind of sinful deviants. The main point I hope to make with this blog is for you to acknowledge that the way the catholic community currently treats LGBTQ+ people is wrong.
A queer affirming catholicism is one that
-rejects legalism
-does not police who can call themselves “catholic”
-rejects discrimination
-rejects performative christianity
-rejects purity culture
-is person-centric
-is conscience-centered and trusts as well as respects an individual’s discernment about their lives
-uses the terminology an individual is comfortable with instead of coming up with their own labels
-supports and respects all LGBTQ+ people without judgement
-seeks to listen and learn more
These are the tenants of how to be an ally to the community. Read more here or here.
At the end of the day, “a vision for LGBTQ+ affirming catholicism” just means that we allow people to be people. Without analyzing, scrutinizing, and rejecting them. We allow adults to make decisions about their personal lives without interfering with the process, firing them, or judging them. And sometimes, it means we just listen without interjecting our own opinions, story, or experiences. That we joyfully rejoice together in our shared belief in who God is and what that means to us.
And most importantly, whenever we have more social authority/respect/power than someone else, that we use that power to lift someone else up, too.
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Related reading: article in the National Catholic Register - Why I still Call Myself a Catholic